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The Macalope: The Goldilocks phone

The Macalope | Feb. 12, 2014
Now that we've all come to the conclusion that Apple is definitely going to make a larger phone (come on, people, it was on all the rumor sites), the question now becomes exactly how a larger phone will doom Apple.

Now that we've all come to the conclusion that Apple is definitely going to make a larger phone (come on, people, it was on all the rumor sites), the question now becomes exactly how a larger phone will doom Apple.

Naturally.

Over at Forbes, Anthony Wing Kosner asks:

"Will Apple's iPhone 6 Phablet Push The Usability Of iOS To A Breaking Point?" (no link but tip o' the antlers to Shawn King).

It seems abundantly clear that Apple has been bitten by the serpent that Steve Jobs disdained.

Satan?

I refer, of course, to the "phablet" ...

Oh. Did Jobs really have a thing against larger phones? He made noises about not liking smaller tablets, but he also said television was for "turning off your brain" and then spent his last days conceptualizing something to do with television.

More importantly, he also said "Don't worry about what I would have done." It's kind of funny that the ones who didn't understand what he did while he was alive are the ones who are most worried about what he would have done now that he's dead.

The iPhone is going large and it is just a matter of how large.

Spoiler alert: No matter how large it is, it won't be large enough to save Apple.

... we have to approach this current iPhone cycle armed with the knowledge of the increasing porousness of Fortress Cupertino.

It's not Cupertino that's porous, it's the Chinese supply chain.

So when The Wall Street Journal comes out and says that "Apple plans an iPhone model with a screen larger than 4½ inches measured diagonally, and a second version with a display bigger than 5 inches," we treat it as more than idle gossip.

Because dope springs eternal.

And some of us do more than just write about what Apple will do next.

Ew.

EW.

... based on the WSJ information that allow us to visualize not only what these new devices might look like, but how Apple's mobile operating system will fare in this super-sized environment.

And, based on these design concepts — which will probably look nothing at all like what Apple ships — let me make some wild assumptions.

... what Apple's "sandboxed" approach doesn't do for users is give them the freedom, one level up, to download an app that lets them control the representation of those icons on their screen or any other more sophisticated way of managing applications. This is why so many users jailbreak their iPhones.

How many? Heck if Kosner knows. It is enough to say "so many." So, very many.

How many?

Shhh. So many.

But ...

 

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