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GUEST BLOG: The Macalope weekly: Early reviews

The Macalope | Aug. 27, 2012
An Apple television set may or may not be coming for a while yet, but that doesn’t mean we can’t compare it to other products, right? And, heck, if we can compare the mythical Apple television to other things, we sure as heck can compare the next iPhone to things, right? Finally, how ‘bout that Tim Cook?

An Apple television set may or may not be coming for a while yet, but that doesnt mean we cant compare it to other products, right? And, heck, if we can compare the mythical Apple television to other things, we sure as heck can compare the next iPhone to things, right? Finally, how bout that Tim Cook?

Money maker upper

CNNMoneys David Goldman has seen the Apple future, and it is available today from Microsoft!

According to Goldman, Microsoft already makes something with the features of the rumored Apple television (tip o the antlers to Jim Platchy).

Wait, wait, wait. David Goldman. David Goldman. Why does that name ring a bell of ridiculousness in the Macalopes furry head?

Ohhh, yeah. Probably because he was the guy who said Apple needed to kill it with the iPad 2 event, as competitors like the Motorola Xoom were giving the iPad a run for its money.

He said that. He really did. The Macalope gets the feeling that sometimes people think he makes up the stupid things these pundits say, but the sad reality is that hes never had to.

If that wasnt weapons-grade dumb enough for you, Goldman also warned back in 2010 that Apple had lost touch with its customer base.

Yeah.

Anyway, he continues to be employed by CNNMoney to write about technology.

[sad trombone]

If youre longing impatiently for the much-hyped features of Apples rumored new TV, you dont have to wait. Theyre already here.

Buh? The Macalopes wondering how anyone could say that when we dont have the slightest idea of what an Apple TV would look like. But now he remembers whos writing this piece, so lets just continue.

Microsofts Xbox Live service already does what Apple is reportedly negotiating with the cable companies to pull off.

Oh, no! Then why is Apple even bothering?!

The company has 40 million Xbox Live customers, while Apple has sold fewer than 10 million Apple TVs.

Microsoft has 40 million Xbox Live subscribers, which anyone can become for free just by owning Windows, an Xbox, or maybe even one of Steve Ballmers sweaty old shirts.

With Xbox Live, Microsoft hasnt tried to outshine its partners.

Dont make the sum greater than the parts! Just make it equal to them! Theres a recipe for a winner of a product.

According to Goldman, you can get all the features of the rumored Apple television right now with the Xbox Live. The only difference is that Microsoft played softball with the cable companies, while Apple will play hardball in order to get a better experience for its customers. So, he admits, theyre really not the same at all.

 

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